Circular, circle. Feel it. Go with the Flow. Do the Bull Dance.

I haven’t written anything in awhile and I want to blame it on the craziness that is the NHL trade deadline. Instead, I’ll tell you the truth and let it be known that I feel inadequate in every way. Having visited an Apple store for the first time last week with my girlfriend, I find myself thinking about whether or not there is a place in this world for me. You see, everyone who works there is a GENIUS. All employees walk around with name tags that say “Hi, I’m a Genius. Art Scranafran” I used a false name because I wouldn’t want you to bombard these intellectual giants with your mundane questions. Once you enter the store and gather the courage to consult one of these geniuses you are given the opportunity to wait a few more minutes before you can sit down with a genius with an even bigger brain….wait for it…..at the Genius Bar. Here you can fully explore your Mac/iPod/iPhone problems or think about how you’ve failed to live up to your potential because you’ve missed out on the genius moniker. I was beginning to feel light headed (due to the rarefied air) and quietly prayed that this herd of geniuses could fix the computer sooner rather than later. I was in luck. These were, after all, geniuses. The problem was resolved and a return to normal oxygen levels got me thinking (had my brush with greatness influenced me?). I began to think about the audacity of a company to offer help from geniuses in their retail outlets. Wouldn’t normal computing folks shrink in awe from these divine beings? A brief w-w-w search later netted me an answer.

http://www.macobserver.com/article/2008/01/21.9.shtml

Apparently Mac users don’t lack confidence about their own mental capacity and might even be called conceited. I wonder if they feel this way because they have geniuses working for them or if Apple employs geniuses to deal with these haughty consumers. This “which comes first” is analogous to the age old chicken or the egg question and is best summed up by Luna Lovegood. They are both like a circle and know no beginning or end.

Pure Unadulterated Joy

Last night the Phoenix Suns played the Golden State Warriors in what can only be described as a thrilling basketball game. The pace was frenetic and the skill was obvious. People often wonder why I like the NBA more than college ball and games like this make me feel good about my preference. These were two whirling dervishes fighting to the last second. Open jumpers were drained, drives were finished and there was no shortage of spectacular plays. I hoped and prayed for overtime only to denied by a few surprisingly missed shots at the end.

I think the best part was listening to Jeff Van Gundy call the game. He single handedly set the game back to the stone age when he was coaching and would have been apopleptic had he actually been involved in the game. The defense was cursory at best and the rebounding left a lot to be desired. But, the offense was divine and he was loving it. You could hear the glee in his voice as he talked about each team's mantra of "there are no bad shots". And tonight, there really weren't.

This game was like white truffles to a gourmet, a bourdeaux to a oenophile, a fine cuban cigar to an afficionado, surredering to the French. It was the most natural and beautiful expression of basketball I have seen (since their last meeting) and I can only hope that we are treated to a seven course meal this May in the playoffs.

Lessons Learned

In my first real post I talked about how bored I was of the steroids talk. I talked about how the report won't have much impact on the game itself and that MLB would be better served to spend those funds in other ways.

Well, today I'm fascinated by the 'Clemens' hearings on the Hill. Do I think they are a monumental waste of time? Yes. Do I think they are a glorified witch hunt out to bag a big name in Roger Clemens? Yes. So, why am I writing about this? Because, it seems people still haven't figured out the court of public opinion.

Baseball is a game that almost celebrates cheating. Whether it be the grounds crew shaving a mound down a few inches, watering the basepaths, growing jungle like infields or players stealing signs, cheating has been a part of baseball since the game's inception. Gaylord Perry, a well known and well liked pitcher, threw a spit ball for much of his career and. He seems incorrigible, not dirty. So, being linked to steroids, if they are as pervasive in the sport as thought to be, would not totally destroy a reputation.

The American public seems to operate this way; if you screw up in any fashion, don't lie about it. And, that is especially true when giving testimony to the grand jury (see: barry bonds) or to Congress because the spectre of jail time looms over them for perjury. Accept responsibility, show remorse and the public will come back to you. The cover up is always worse than the crime. Ask Nixon.

Thinking about this reminds me of my favorite cheating story in baseball history. A few years ago Jose Guillen, now playing for the Royals, was on assignment in the minor leagues after an injury. He was just going to be down there for a few games to get his timing and legs back. In one of those games he broke his bat and cork was discovered. These games and statistics didn't matter at all in the grand scheme of things and Jose Guillen was still out there looking for an edge. I guess the phrase "If you're not cheating, you're not trying." applies here. In spades.

*This is all based on the assumption of Clemens's guilt. Which, judging from the testimony of Pettite and Clemens himself, seems likely. I still can't believe he threw his wife under the bus in saying that she used HGH. Good grief. I doubt very much that she learned about HGH and its effects at her book club.

Super Thoughts Following Super Days

The Republicans have essentially established their candidate. The Democrats remain locked in what looks like will be a long, drawn out battle. This has been the MOs of both parties in the past few elections and I can’t help but wonder if it will have an impact come November. The Republicans seem to be pragmatic about sending their nominee up to the plate. They decide early and give that person a lot of time to motivate the base. I think this has a lot to do with the nature of Republican politics. Usually you can describe an R using eight words that cover 4 themes: Strong defense, Low taxes, Small Government, Family Values. By the time November rolls around, the candidate has the full support of its party and only has to convince a few Dems/Inds to join the crusade. Meanwhile, the Dem candidates will fight it out to the bitter end, which potentially could be divisive. Because the decision to nominate someone comes so late in the game, I wonder if the supporters of his or her opponent are so disillusioned and bitter that they either fail to show up, vote for a third party candidate or a dreaded Republican. Time will tell if the Democrats are unified. They certainly were in the midterm elections, but the scale was so much smaller.

It looks like Shaq will be traded from the sinking ship that is the Miami Heat to the Phoenix Suns for Shawn Marion and the awful contract of Marcus Banks. At first glance I thought that this was crazy. Why would the Suns, who are chugging along with the best record in the Western Conference, shake up their team? I can’t say for certain that the chemistry issues in the Suns locker room are bad because I have no access. I have read many accounts, however, that speak to that. It seems like chemistry in the NBA is paramount to success. With the addition of Shaq, the Suns also become a more versatile team. I feel as though they can continue to play their uptempo brand of ball when Shaq is on the bench by employing a lineup of Nash, Bell, Hill, Diaw and Amare. Between Hill and Diaw they can match up with the 2s, 3s, and 4s of most teams in the similar fashion to the currently constructed team. They can also go big, which they could not do before, and send out a lineup of Nash, Hill, Diaw, Amare and Shaq. You can throw Barbosa or Bell in there for any of the first three and hardly miss a beat. It seems crazy that Shaq, arguably one of the best players I’ve seen in my lifetime, could be traded twice. For the Heat, the incentive to make the move is obvious. They are going nowhere fast and to get a player of Marion’s caliber would be a coup. They can either retain him or welcome his cap space at the end of the year. Either way, they will be considerably better in the long run without the aging Shaq and his massive contract.

The Super Bowl was fantastic. Usually, if I don’t have a horse in the race I’m not as enthusiastic about the event as most. I see the Super Bowl for what it is: a tourist event. We have two weeks of hype and endless media coverage followed by a gathering of ‘sports fans’ in a room that can’t possibly seat everyone and has people talking during important game action. Not my idea of a good time. This year I couldn’t have cared less about the seating situation. I could have watched this game locked in an airplane lavatory. The action in the game was phenomenal and the two fourth quarter drives were divine. That was an absolute A+ of an event, which is saying something considering I despise the Giants and don’t think much of the Patriots.