Your Communist New York Knicks

To write about Isiah Thomas these days seems like piling on. He’s been skewered by journalists, players and especially the local fans. Today they took to the streets to protest his mere existence in their beloved organization.

http://www.nytimes.com/2007/12/19/sports/basketball/19garden.html?_r=1&ref=basketball&oref=slogin

Normally I’m opposed to franchises kowtowing to the general public because it often leads to both fiscal and personnel errors in judgment. This is especially evident in the wake of recent success and years of connection to one team. For instance, many of the faithful Red Sox Nation wanted to bring back local heroes like Pedro Martinez and Derek Lowe following the sweet, sweet victory in the 2004 World Series. Because of their success in the aforementioned series and the body of work throughout their careers they were offered big contracts in the off season by other teams. Loyalty schmoyalty. The future looking Red Sox severed ties with their now overpaid and over the hill heroes and moved on. They almost certainly wouldn’t have won the World Series this year or be in line to consistently compete if they still had those two pitchers filling spots in their rotation. But I digress.

The purpose of this post is to compare the current Knicks organization to ‘communist countries’ like Venezuela, Russia and Iran. I use quotes because these countries are actually ‘republics’ with leaders elected by the general populace.

Inefficient use of raw materials – Check
Iran has some the biggest oil reserves in the world and yet their economy suffers because they don’t have the wherewithal to properly refine the oil. A tax ration was imposed on the citizens earlier this year that caused riots. The NY Knicks are paying more players not to play nearly as much as some teams are paying their players to participate in the 07-08 season. The players that are ‘contributing’ to the current season are doing so at a clip that would make the mid to late 90’s Clippers look like the current Celtics.

Corruption – Check
This one is fairly easy. Sexual harassment costs the franchise 11.5 million and management doesn’t do anything to reprimand the source of the problem. Sounds like a culture bereft of integrity and chock full of corruption. I could link to a number of stories detailing rampant corruption amongst government officials in these countries, but I won’t because government corruption seems to be a fact of life regardless of what type of government is in place.

Propaganda machine – Check
Many of these countries operate their own TV stations that disseminate information to the masses. http://www.cnn.com/2007/WORLD/americas/05/28/venezuela.protest/index.html
The Knicks have the MSG network, which fired Marv Albert for being realistic about the team a few years back. I think it is fair to say that he is the preeminent voice of the NBA and to let him go to the rival NJ Nets is an absolute joke. I’m sure the fans don’t miss him much.

Lack of Free Speech- Check
Can you speak out publicly against the government without fear of harassment?
In Russia, the answer is no.
http://www.europarl.europa.eu/news/expert/infopress_page/015-5754-113-04-17-902-20070420IPR05700-23-04-2007-2007-false/default_en.htm
Gary Kasparov, a national chess champion and opposition party member, was arrested while attended a public rally. The arrest is ridiculous and harkens back to days of the hammer and sickle. Can you speak (or display on poster board) your mind at the Garden? The answer, sadly, is no. Yesterday at the Knicks game, a fan was removed from the building for holding up a sign right behind the bench that said, “Fire Isiah”. I’m fairly certain that had the sign read, “Isiah wears great ties” nothing would have happened. Escorting him out of the building under the guise of maintaining sight lines for other fans is utterly ridiculous.

Protesting Citizens – Check













The NBA – Where amazing happens (except in New York where amazing isn’t on the list of things provided by Mother Knickerbocker.)

Keystone Cops - Alive and well in New Jersey

I couldn't help but think of inept police officers from tv shows like the Keystone Cops or the Andy Griffith Show when I read this article.

http://www.cnn.com/2007/US/law/12/17/jail.escape.ap/index.html

And, at first it does seem hilarious. How could professional prison guards fall for something like this. Everyone and their brother has seen "Shawshank Redemption". I think its actual company policy on the Turner family of networks that not two weeks in the year can go by without at least one showing. It would seem that after the popularity of such a movie that checking out a prisoner's cell thoroughly would be pretty standard, much like childhood summers spent in Rangoon and luge lessons.

Anyway, the fact of the matter is that through the ineptitude of a few, many are once again at risk. If these outlaws commit further criminal acts whilst on the lam (not on the lamb..... http://youtube.com/watch?v=jEwERdL-zwY) will their former jailors be considered accessories to the crimes? Gosh, I hope so.

This got me thinking about what an acceptable punishment might be for their lack of vigilance. I think we should bring back some public humiliation for moves this idiotic. Perhaps a few laps around the prison or some time spent in the stocks or pillory. I'm sure the local townsfolk would appreciate the opportunity to hurl both insults and rotten vegetables at those responsible.

No Pants Dance

I was struggling with a post regarding the death penalty today and decided to scrap it and revisit it later. It was just not right for a Friday during the Holidays. Plus, I'm currently in the throes of a meat/nog coma and my creative juices are not flowing properly. Perhaps food and drink like that clog more than arteries in your heart....

Instead I'll write about something lighter. I just realized that Phil Ford, former UNC player and assistant coach, currently coaches for the Charlotte Bobcats. I had no idea. This is incredible because Jeff McInnis, former UNC player who played for Ford, currently plays for Charlotte. While at UNC it was rumored that McInnis "tagged" Ford's wife. Of all the list of no-no's attached to locker room behavior I have to believe that sleeping with the coach's or anyone's significant other is up there. It might be behind "don't kill a teammate", but it is definitely ahead of wearing other people's uniforms.
http://http://www.newyorker.com/reporting/2007/04/23/070423fa_fact_mcgrath?currentPage=all

Which brings me to another point, Manny Ramirez is nuts. In a good way.

Anyway, even if McInnis and Mrs. Ford never played the naked doctor, its still fun to think about. How could Phil Ford have exerted any kind of control over him on the court if his young charge destroyed the sanctity of Ford's marriage? No amount of suicides and wall sits can take that away.

Beltway BS

My first real post. I'm excited because this will encompass much of what I hope to write about in the future. Sports and politics. I'll probably sprinkle in some tasty pop culture and hope that it rises properly.

The Mitchell Report bores me. I think it is fairly obvious that baseball currently exists in a steroid era. Most casual fans could tell you that. Why MLB formed this committee, spent upwards of $20 million and approximately one year to compile data linking players to performance enhancers seems wasteful. This is what happens when you put a politician in charge of a program like this. This reeks of beltway BS. Modus Operandi on the hill: Lets form a committe, expend an exorbitant amount of resources/time and then point out a problem. Only very rarely will solutions come to the forefront.

Everyone knows Social Security is a massive problem. Everyone knows the clock is ticking. The president offered his idea of a solution. No D's liked it and many R's were uncomfortable with it. What happened? Months of pointing out flaws and tearing it down. Alternatives suggetsted: none. I predict that the country won't have a plan in place to deal with the crisis until the last possible moment. Just like the last change in Social Security policy. Democrats and Republicans may wrestle for control of Congress, but really the party of Procrastination reigns supreme.

With the Dems in control for the last year or so they have instituted longer legislative work periods. Is this a good thing? So many of the complaints lobbed towards politicians these days center around the fact that they are detached from the reality of typical Americans. Do you want your politicians creating laws 280 days a year. I hope not. There are only so many Post Offices to be named. I'd rather have them spending time in their districts or traveling to factories/farms/hospitals/foreign lands depending on their committee assignment.

And we're back.

Wouldn't the time and funds have been better spent searching for a solution to the problem? I'd like steroids out of baseball. How can this be achieved? Well, it seems that the science of detection rarely keeps up with the science of doping. I think the solution lies with the scientists moving the doping forward. Surely these men and women don't really care at all about the athletes, the records or the fans. They are probably motivated by their wallets. Wouldn't it behoove (http://www.elgaffney.blogspot.com) MLB to recruit these people to keep them apprised of the evolving world of doping. Surely they could have used that $20 million to entice a few of them to turn on each other. Its not like they have strictly kept morals. They are, after all, breaking the law. This is very much like the situation in a very average movie, "Catch Me if You Can". If its good enough for the FBI, surely its good enough for baseball.

I haven't written anything except for funny emails in the last few years and would greatly appreciate feedback regarding style, grammar, content, etc.

Everyone else is doing it.

No, mom, I'm not drinking wine coolers in the woods, smoking cigarettes or jumpng off cliffs, I'm blogging. I'm sure that modern family statistics read something like this: 2.3 kids, 2 cars, 1.4 pets and 8 blogs. Lets "put it (another one) on the board."*

Why am I blogging? I have opinions. Lots of them. I'm filled with useless information. I'd like to impress the diapers off of you with wet (why does it always have to be dry) wit and statistics. I've pooped twice today. That may be of importance only to me and to CVS to restock their triple ply paper products. What can I say, I like to share.

I'm really blogging because I'd like to become a better writer. I plan on going back to school in the not too distant future and am horribly rusty. The thought of anyone reading this horrifies me. I suppose I should learn how to use semi colon.

*Because I spent my college career avoiding computers I will struggle, only initially I hope, to provide proper props to those I'm quoting. For instance, I'd love to link the Chicago White Sox announcer who screams "PUT IT ON THE BOARD" for every home run. Alas, not sure how to get that done right now. Hopefully he won't feel bad.